Opinion: Hamas still holds my grandfather hostage. We’re out of time.

Throughout my life, Rosh Hashanah, or the Jewish New Year, has been a time of reflection – a chance to fondly look back at a year of memorable moments, days, months or seasons. I did this last year, taking stock of what I had and hoped for in the coming year. But not long after last year’s holiday, on Oct. 7, 2023, everything changed and I will never be able to approach the holiday with the same sense of hope and renewal as I once did. 
On that dark day one year ago, my grandparents, Yocheved and Oded Lifshitz, peace activists who were among the founders of Kibbutz Nir Oz, were brutally taken hostage by Hamas, along with many others in their community. 
Since then, my life went from a quiet existence to flying around the world, advocating to anyone in power who would listen to save my 84-year-old grandfather, who is still being held hostage by Hamas, before it’s too late. The past year has been a blur of protests and meetings with foreign dignitaries, moments of relief and hope, grief and despair, and reminders that the world keeps turning even if our lives have been at a standstill.
Now, each moment is intrinsically linked to the number of days my grandfather has suffered in captivity.  
Day 0: The dark Saturday. My grandparents hid in their safe room until Hamas terrorists shot their way in. They took my grandparents – people who had fought for a peaceful coexistence their whole lives and transported sick Gazans to Israeli hospitals – hostage. 
Days 1-5: Each day we learned more about the level of death and destruction in our community, Kibbutz Nir Oz, where nearly a quarter of the 400 residents were murdered or taken hostage. We heard about the other kibbutzim that were ransacked and what happened at a music festival meant to promote love and peace. In our state of absolute shock and horror, we worried about my grandparents, then ages 83 and 84. Could they survive being held hostage?
Day 17: Momentary relief. My grandmother was released. In just two weeks she lost 10 kilos (22 pounds) and suffered from extreme diarrhea. She said she met a Hamas leader in the tunnels and, though diminished, she didn’t lose her signature strength. She asked him directly how he could do this to innocent people, the ones who had advocated for peace. 
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Day 38: I landed in New York for my first international advocacy mission with my new, unwanted identity of “hostage family member.” All I could think about while I was in fancy rooms at the United Nations with high-powered people was: “What kind of room was my grandfather in? Can he breathe?”
Day 49-56: A temporary cease-fire/hostage deal in Gaza. We watched with hope as more than 100 hostages – women and young children – were released from captivity, many of whom my family knew or had gotten to know as we built a community with our comrades in tragedy. We hoped my grandfather would be on the list to be set free. Sadly, the deal fell apart after seven days, and there’s been no negotiated deal since. 
Day 157: Back to Germany and Washington, D.C., for meetings with elected leaders and dignitaries. I brought photos of my grandfather and my best friend, Dolev Yehoud, taking them along on this journey to fight for their freedom. I thought they’d one day like to see their heads next to the U.S. Congress and a Frida Kahlo painting at an art museum. I heard many politicians express their sadness and contempt for Hamas for doing something so evil and holding so many people hostage. But contempt must turn into action to bring them home. 
Day 217: My grandfather turned 84 on May 11th. Does he even know today is his birthday? It’s hard to know how to celebrate someone in captivity, so we spent the day honoring him by tending to his beloved cactus garden in Nir Oz. He and my grandmother grew several hundreds of cacti, succulents and euphorbias. The garden had fallen into disrepair without his watchful eye. I hope we made him proud. 
Day 237: A deal seemed close. President Joe Biden announced that the Israeli government agreed to a three-phase deal. Now, Hamas had to agree. My grandfather, a former journalist and lifelong human rights advocate, would have been covering these negotiations with vigor. As a sixth-generation Israeli who fought in four Israeli wars (including Oct. 7) he understands more than anyone that Hamas started this war with their terror. But he’d also understand the imperative of reaching a hostage release and cease-fire deal for the future of Israel and peace in the region.  
Day 240: My best friend since childhood, Dolev, had been presumed held hostage alongside my grandfather. On this day we learned he was dead, murdered on Oct. 7. The last time I saw Dolev was Rosh Hashanah 2023. I sat with him, his wife, Sigal, and the children on their balcony in the kibbutz. We played card games and kicked around the football. My heart breaks for Sigal and their four children (the fourth was born on Oct. 16 and will never meet her father). Oct. 7 destroyed so many families. 
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Day 328: This is the day that six hostages ‒ Hersh Goldberg-Polin, Carmel Gat, Ori Danino, Almog Sarusi, Alexander Lobanov and Eden Yerushalmi ‒ were murdered in captivity. They could have been reunited with their families if a deal had been reached earlier, but the Israeli government was adding new provisions and Hamas wouldn’t come to the table. I was devastated for their families and worried for my own. 
Day 365: It is hard to put the past year into words. I can no longer listen to music. My grandfather, a talented pianist, can play any song on the piano by just listening to it once. I feel guilty enjoying music when he cannot. I miss my grandfather and our conversations. My daughter misses her great-grandfather. My grandmother misses her husband and is struggling mentally and emotionally.
As I reflect on this Jewish New Year and the first anniversary of Oct. 7, it is one punctuated with emotions tied to memories, all the while my grandfather has been in dangerous captivity. We are out of time. We must bring my grandfather Oded and the remaining 100 innocent hostages home, and a negotiated deal is the only viable path to make that happen.
It has been 365 days filled with glimmers of hope followed by overwhelming sadness. I should not have had to wait one day for my grandfather to come home, let alone 365.
Daniel Lifshitz, who grew up on Kibbutz Nir Oz, is a ex-footballer for Maccabi Tel Aviv and founder of Bourgogne Crown, a wine importing company. He shifted his focus to humanitarian advocacy following the Oct. 7 attacks when his grandparents were taken hostage.